Why things don't work out sometimes

This post will be a tad bit personal (very very indirectly). It will also feature a lot of talk about food. You've been warned :)

So we all have friends. And I've written a whole lot about friendship. One of the most important things in life, for me, are my friends. I don't mean people I see once a month or so, or those I'm friends with on facebook. By friends I mean those I can pour my heart out to, those who listen. These are people who matter to me, people I know and love.

Sometimes though, certain people lose the place they once had in your life. They stop being special, they stop being a need. You get used to their absence, and you stop missing them. Sometimes you don't realize a friend is gone, because the distance grows very slowly. But sometimes you forcefully put that distance between your self and your friend. I've done that, many times. I've told people to leave me alone, I've made the Venn diagram of our lives two separate circles. Sometimes I've looked back and wished that I hadn't been so selfish, or rather, inconsiderate.

And I've thought about my People of the Past list. I've thought about each friendship and why it didn't work out. So here are those reasons, and a few more that could decide the fate of the relationship between two friends.

1. The load is too much

So you know how some meals are just too much for you, and so, even though you love that particular meal, you have something else, because the full tummy isn't worth it? Take a burger meal, once you have the burger, there is no more room for the fries so instead you don't buy the burger meal and just get a burger instead?

Some people and what they offer/expect is like the burger meal. The friendship is just too much for you, so you end the friendship. And you may wonder why you didn't realize this before the friendship began. Well, how can you know the burger meal is too much before buying your first meal?

2. Your expectations aren't met.

Fish and chips are lovely. They are amazing, and gorgeous. But the dish at say Restaurant Friendship isn't really that satisfactory. You expect heaven, you get the human world. So do you go back to Restaurant Friendship for more and more disappointment? No! You just don't get the fish and chips anymore.

Likewise, you have all these expectations, but they aren't met, so you just walk off and never look back.

3. Things just didn't work out.

Sushi! Now let's say, you've never had sushi, you don't know what it tastes like. And someone tells you this place has great sushi, and so you go to try it out. And you get there, order what you feel is best and patiently wait for your food. Then you take that first bite, you politely swallow it and gulp a whole lot of water to get rid of the taste. Sushi and you just don't get along, the relationship won't work out so you never have sushi again.

4. The friendship wasn't healthy/good for you

You love pineapple. Anything with pineapple gets you all high and excited. Pineapple jam, juice, cake, pudding, anything with pineapple. You are the kind of person who wants to steal Spongebob's home! But pineapple is too acidic for you, and so it makes you feel like a dragon. It makes three points of your body (the places you puke, pee and poop) feel like they are on fire. Your lips burn, you can't pee and its not at all fun! So you stop eating pineapple, and keep your distance from the fruit. You even stop watching Spongebob. On and off though you may have a bit of pineapple because you can't resist the temptation and you regret it forever.

5. Your system rejects the friendship.

So everything is perfect. You love prawns, you live in an area where prawn is easy to find. The dishes are perfect and lovely and all that. But you are allergic to prawn. This is different from the above situation because its not your stupid self, or when it comes to friendship, your heart, that says no to the friendship. It's your mind. Your entire system rejects that friendship. Your brain keeps telling you, "oh no, you ain't gonna look at Mr. Gorgeous Hair, even though you two have perfect chemistry, and you two get along so well, because if you even think about him, I'm going to make you feel like poop!"

6. Can't have it, so don't want it

Some people can't eat sweets even though they like them because they get terrible toothaches. Likewise you can't be friends with someone because their overbearing lover has already cursed you ten times or their mother keeps on playing matchmaker, or some such thing. Since the toothache just isn't worth it, you don't eat chocolate. Even though you love it!

7. Something's just not right

Since the chocolate chips give you bad toothaches, you can't have the chocolate chip cookies. But they are delicious! And the chocolate cookies just don't taste right! Or they dont even exist. So you can't have chocolate chip cookies because of one dumb thing that's part of it.

Or an even worse thing is something like a nice cheese sauce sandwich. It's absolutely yummy, but there's mayonnaise in it, and you don't like mayo so you ask the sandwich maker if they can do it without the mayonnaise and they say no. Not because they are mean, but because the sandwich won't be the same without mayonnaise. And you know this so you have the fish sandwich instead, because that doesn't have mayonnaise in it!