Of all the things that could happen to a person, today’s youth assumes being friendzoned is the worst of them all. Of course, there may be a few confused by the term. Simply put, the friendzone is a place for all your friends of the opposite sex who you have no intention of dating. This doesn’t sound too bad, right? Personally, I prefer being friends with people knowing they don’t expect anything more than friendship. Yes, it is nice to be with someone you think is boyfriend material, and to feel all those emotions you felt when you had a crush on some boy when you were fourteen! Yet, friendship isn’t a path that must lead to a romantic relationship.
The order of events isn’t always, strangers, friends, lovers… It can be that, and it is romantic when best friends fall in love with each other. However, you don’t make friends with people with an ulterior motive of dating them. You don’t make that friendship ‘happen’ hoping they will someday fall in love with you. There are such instances. However, the friendship either dies down or becomes something that makes you forget the intention with which you started that friendship.
For this reason, the friendzone seems like an insult. If someone tells me I’ve been friendzoned, they will definitely lose a friend in me. However, the friendzone has another side to it. This side makes the friendzoner look bad.
One is friendzoned when they are under the impression the other likes them, only to find out they are liked ‘only as a friend.’ This is when it hits them that all those favors done for them were done in vain. While one can argue that favors shouldn’t be done in hope of a reward, in a friendzoning incident, the friendzoner often misleads the friendzoned. No matter what we say, we can’t deny expecting a reward. When we do something for another, we expect payment. In the case of most, when a favor is done for a friend they ‘like,’ the reward expected is a date. And so the unassuming do everything they can for a friend only to be told they have been friendzoned.
Thanks to the friendzone, we are more cautious with our emotions. We tend to not care too much or show how vulnerable we are. We are afraid of being rejected, of being friendzoned. When you think of it though, being friendzoned isn’t too bad. It allows you to be someone’s friend without worrying about coming off as flirty. There’s no embarrassment about being seeing together, and you don’t have to worry your friend will misunderstand the teasing of your other friends. You both know your friendship won’t take another path, and this allows you to truly trust and love each other.
However, if you are being used, don’t wave it off as something you have to deal with as someone who has been friendzoned. You shouldn’t be misled and given hope just so another’s life will be made easier.
Sri Lanka, of course, has a few more zones you can get stuck in. The ‘machanzone’ is something you either love or hate. Males tend to consider each other their machans. However, some females also fall into the machan category. This is when you are one of them. Often tomboys are the ones who are machanzoned, and they absolutely love this. Its like being accepted into that world you so want to be part of. However, for someone who wants to be more than friends with her male friends, the machanzone is the worst place they could be in. This is when you know things have gone too far in the wrong direction.
There is also a brozone. The brozone is the friendzone taken to another level. Here, you are looked at as a sibling. Why people take this as a bad thing, I’m yet to understand. I would be honored if someone treats me as a sibling, and takes care of me as one. However, what people want in a friendship is quite difficult to understand, and this is why the various zones you can find yourself in will continue to baffle people.