It’s the last day of November, which means that tomorrow will be the beginning of the last month of 2015. It’s been an interesting year but an all about 2015 post will be better at the end of the year. Today, it will be all about November.
This month, I left my job and spent the month at home. I didn’t look for another job, which I sort of regret now because not having anything to do is frustrating. But I’m happy I finally decided to leave this place that was always like home to me. It was time and while I still love the place and people, I shouldn’t have been there any longer.
In October, I promised myself that if I wrote 30,000 words of ‘my story’ by the end of 2015, I would take a year off work and focus on my writing. I completed NaNoWriMo, something I didn’t think was at all possible and so I now have a 50,000 word story. It’s nowhere close to completion but I’ve at least taken the first step towards finally writing a story. You see, I love writing and while all these stories keep clouding my mind, all I write are articles, blog posts like this and poems. I struggled with actually writing stories. 50,000 words, for me, is a huge achievement.
On Saturday, I had one of the best nights of my life. I attended the UNAIDS event to commemorate World AIDS Day, my friend and I received certificates of appreciation for our articles and then we met with Amma and Aiya and had amazing dinner. After dropping her, I was in the backseat, Aiya was driving and Amma was riding shotgun. The music was good, the wind was cool and everything was peaceful. I was calm after a long time and I was smiling for no reason. I was so tired and so sleepy but I was happy. There’s nothing more you can ask for in life, is there?
This month I went back to feeling like a teenager, which I won’t go into detail about, but I’m happy to know that I have some emotion left in me. I’ve turned into this grumpy person who is always frowning or making faces or being mean/sarcastic and I needed to know that I can be all ‘sunshine in a jar’ too.
November also taught me that people can’t be trusted and that it doesn’t take a very long time for friends to go from being on your side to turning against you. I learned that people can be vicious and cruel. They may gossip and tell tales and lie, but I also learned that there are really nice people. There are people who will wait with you or listen to your rants or just know when you need cheering up.
I also realized how easy it is to be replaced. I won’t go into detail but it hurts when you realize that you have been replaced before you were ready to let go of a place or person.
I’ve always liked being alone but this month made me appreciate solitude and the peace and quiet that comes with it. In November, I got through Faking It, Awkward and a season of Gossip Girl. I watched YouTube videos, studies for semester finals and still wrote all those words. This was possible because I spent day after day at home, with no one besides Mr Meowing to disturb me.
(In case you are wondering, Mr Meowing, as his name suggests, is a cat and not some random man who lives at home.)
November was also a month of good films and good music. The Colombo International Film Festival was held earlier this month and I couldn’t go for more than three films but they were all amazing. And since I have all this time I home, I also watched quite a few films I like. And I know, I said earlier that I watched Faking It, Awkward and Gossip Girl but please believe me when I say, they were mere distractions from certain things I need a distraction from.
This month, I also realized how important it is to listen. It’s easy to nod your head or hmm haa your way through a conversation. But to listen and be listened to, it’s important. When you don’t listen, you miss out on a lot of things and it’s important to listen.
But I also learned that sometimes, you need to not listen. This isn’t when someone is talking to you but when people don’t have your best interests in mind. Dogs may bark, but you are an even bigger idiot if you bark back.
I also learned the power of friendship and how a simple thing like making Christmas cards for people you haven’t even met can make you feel so much better about this world and life. I learned that sometimes all it takes is a smile or a silly joke to make things alright for you. People can be vicious but friends, friends make life worth living.
Talking about Christmas cards and crafts, this month I sewed a bag. Yes, that’s right. I sewed a bag and I’m incredibly proud of myself. And if I managed to sew a bag, well, then there’s no doubt that pigs can fly.
So there you go. November 2015 as I lived it. It was a month of plenty of ups and downs, but I’m glad I lived through it.