Holding the hands of those who held ours

The Nation

I loved taking those first few steps into adulthood. They were slow and small. But they taught me a lot. I once read that parents shouldn’t always stop their children from doing things. Parents learnt from their mistakes, and their children should make mistakes and learn from them. It is why practical lessons in science are very important. We learn more about chemical reactions in a lab than we do from a text book. Likewise we should learn about the world through our own experiences.


As we enter the adult world, at first we are adventurous, scared and excited. We want to experience everything. Soon however, we realize that the adult world isn’t as exciting as it seemed. And we remember people telling us that once you grow up, you wish you never had.


However, the most important thing  about the adult world, for me, was how much our new life and old life were different from each other. When I started working, the first thing I noticed was how little time I had for my own. My weekdays are packed with various chores and duties. I now spend very little time with family.


This is an issue we all face. How do we fit family into our busy schedule? You don’t cut yourself from your family in an instant. First you start spending birthdays with friends instead of family, then the New Year and slowly, you build a world where your family has very little room in your life.


The people you’ll miss the most though, aren’t your parents or siblings, but your grandparents. Most of us were taken care of by our grandparents. They made sure our homework was complete, and we were stuffed and ready for bed by the time our parents got home. They listened to our ranting on imaginary headaches, or tummy aches. They didn’t shout at us when we got home covered in mud after a day out playing. They bought us sweets knowing our parents wouldn’t allow us to eat them. They spoilt us, and they loved us.


My grandmother has always been a pillar of strength to me. She has held my hand when I was sick. Found Eau de Colonge when my body was hot with fever. She patiently listens to my stories, as I talk for hours about people she doesn’t even know. Athammee also gives in to my every request, making bread pudding or crocheting soft toys for me. She has always had time for me, and has always been there.


And my biggest complaint about the adult world is that I don’t get to spend as much time as I would like to with my grandmother.


Recently I overheard two ladies talk about their parents, who would have been my grandmother’s age. One kept complaining about her father who had many imaginary aches and pains; the way he seemed to complain about his health would have left WebMD speechless.


Yet when they are old, in their second childhood, we refuse to listen to them. When we are young, our parents can still manage by themselves. It is our grandparents who need us the most. Cards, flowers and gifts are useless. Before you make plans for your weekend, think twice if your time will instead be spent better with your family. Give your grandparents the time they gave you. Give them the love that they showed you. And that’s the greatest gift you can give a grandparent.

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