A rant about females

Have you ever wondered why god is male? Or why no religion was discovered by a female? If it because we are less intelligent? Or because the truth often leaves us befuddled? Is that why females are often in the background? Left to be seen but not heard.

If you think females belong in the kitchen, do you know what a still very hot and greasy spatula feels on your naked skin? In fact, this is why they say, females live longer. Because the kitchen is where the knives are.

some slightly sexist jokes for you to enjoy!

All joking aside though, females are yet to steal the show because of one reason. We are too busy keeping the world alive. Have you ever had to take care of your home during your mother’s absence? Let me tell you, its torture. Suddenly you realize the morning cup of coffee doesn’t magically make itself. Your breakfast needs preparing. Clothes need to be washed. You realize that when they say mothers should be treated like gods, they are underestimating the value of a mother.

What’s sad is that while we all make fun of the plight of women, we are actually talking about some serious issues. For one, a female is always treated as property. We go from being someone’s daughter, sibling, wife to mother. Our lives always depend on a man. I mean, it’s Mr and Mrs. The female rarely uses her maiden name. Why can’t the men change their surnames instead? Why can’t the kids get their mother’s surname? Is it because the children belong to the father? I wonder if those who answer yes to that question realize that most divorces result in the mother taking care of the children.

Anyway, this is not about females being better than men. Or that men are these disgusting vultures. I know some amazing men, and they are great examples that chivalry isn’t dead. And I’m not saying that all females are saints. Dear god! Some females are devils. I don’t deny that. Also, equal rights. While I think men and women should be able to do the same things, doesn’t mean they actually should do the same things. Now the upper bodies of men are rarely seen as anything sexual. That’s changing though, what with men spending more and more time on their abs. Anyway, just because men can still walk around topless doesn’t mean women should too. Likewise, just because women wear tiny butt shorts, doesn’t mean men should too.

My rant is about the general role females are given. We are the weak ones, the emotional mess. Now, have you ever asked for forgiveness from a female? If so, you’ll know that, generally, they say, “sure, all’s forgotten.” Ah! But females never forget. Because a female mind adds everything done against her, or her loved ones. A female never forgets. And sure we cry when we accidentally kill a mosquito. We cry when watching Wall-E or Titanic. We cry when reading a book. But hurt a female, and don’t you dare expect forgiveness. We aren’t emotionally weak people. You know how people tell you to respect your mother because she went through hell giving birth to you? Well, I’m yet to go through all that, but what females go through once a month is enough to be respected, at least a bit.

 “A man's heart is a wretched, wretched thing. It isn't like a mother's womb. It won't bleed. It won't stretch to make room for you.”
― Khaled Hosseini, A Thousand Splendid Suns

My grandmother once wanted to be a journalist. Her boss, someone in the field, told her it wasn’t a job for a female. I now write for a newspaper and each day I’m reminded that it isn’t the best job for a girl. It’s not easy and when people tell me I need to give it my best, I want to scream at them, that I am. And it would be so much easier if people just stopped treating me specially, because I’m a female. If people stopped pitying me. When I go for interviews, they always manage to ask me what a girl, who went to a ‘Colombo 7’ school, is doing in a job like mine. Or they make it much more difficult to go on, they try to get the best of your innocence. You know how in movies, people whistle and look at a female’s body with just one thought in their minds? Ya? Being watched liked that isn’t fun. It’s insulting.

“Like a compass facing north, a man’s accusing finger always finds a woman. Always.”
― Khaled Hosseini, A Thousand Splendid Suns

And here’s the thing. People don’t understand. You tell your male co-workers you are ‘sick’ and they tell you to stop pretending. You tell them you just can’t handle all that work, they tell you to grow up. You are tired, and you walk to some shop to buy lunch, men just sneer and make damn annoying comments. And being a woman isn’t easy. It’s a life of tumbles and beatings and one bad card after the other. I’m not saying being a man is easy. It isn’t. But men don’t always see how hard it is for us.

So before you hurt a female, in any way, think about your mother, your sister. Before you disrespect a female, before you act like a frustrated pervert, think about the daughter you want someday. Never ever forget that each tear you make a woman cry, you will pay for it.